Just like the title says, I've come to the conclusion that I will never understand myself, I'll never fully figure out why I am the way I am, why it is I can never be happy, why it is that seeing other people happy hurts me, and pisses me off so much, why the things I want always drift too far for me to reach, and why the people I care about come and go like the wind, why is it that the only consistancy I have in my life, is my addiction to adrenaline, which sometimes actually ends up hurting me, my only comfort is speed, and the faster I go the more dangerous my life get's, i want to understand myself, i want to not hate people who are happy, and i want to be happy, but I can't find it, I can never find it, thus is the life of a broken man.